Love Will Automatically Erase Past Hurt

Customer Service Call

Customer: I'm not very technical, but I just receive LOVE and think I an ready to install now. What do I do first?

CS Rep: The first step is to open your HEART. Have you located your HEART ma'am?

Customer: Yes, I have, but here are several programs running right now. Is it okay to install while they are running?

CS Rep: What programs are running ma'am?

Customer: Let me see... I have PAST-HURT.EXE, LOW-SELF-ESTEEM.EXE, GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM running right now.

CS Rep: No problem. LOVE will automatically erase PAST-HURT.EXE from your current operating system. It may remain in your permanent memory, but it will no longer disrupt other programs. LOVE will eventually overwrite LOW-SELF-ESTEEM.EXE with a module of its own called HIGH-SELF-ESTEEM.EXE. However, you have to completely turn of GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM. Those programs prevent LOVE form being properly installed. Can you turn those off ma'am?

Customer: I don't know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how?

CS Rep: My pleasure. Go to your Start menu and invoke FORGIVENESS.EXE. Do this as many times as necessary until GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM have been completely erased.

Customer: Okay, I'm done. LOVE has started installing it's self automatically. Is that normal?

CS Rep: Yes it is. You should receive a message that says it will re-install for the life of your HEART. Do you see the message?

Customer: Yes, I do. Is it completely installed?

CS Rep: Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You need to begin connecting to other HEART'S in order to get the upgrades.

Customer: Oops... I have an error message already. What should I do?

CS Rep: What does the message say?

Customer: It says "ERROR 412 - PROGRAM NOT RUN ON INTERNAL COMPONENTS." What does this mean?

CS Rep: Don't worry ma'am, that's a common problem. It means that the LOVE program is set up to run on external HEARTS but has not yet been run on your HEART. It is one of those complicated programming things, but in non-technical terms it means you have to "LOVE" your own machine before it can "LOVE" others.

Customer: So what should I do?

CS Rep: Can you find the directory called SELF-ACCEPTANCE?

Customer: Yes, I have it.

CS Rep: Excellent, you are getting good at this.

Customer: Thank you.

CS Rep: You're welcome. Click on the following files and then copy them to the MY-HEART directory: FORGIVE-SELF.ORG, SELF-ESTEEM.TXT, REALIZE-WORTH.TXT and GOODNESS.DOC. They system will overwrite any conflicting files and begin patching any faulty programming. Also, you need to delete SELF-CRITIC.ETE from all directories, and then empty your recycle bin afterwards to make sure it is completely gone and never come back.

Customer: Got it Hey! My HEART is filling up with really neat files. SMILE.MPG is playing on my monitor right now and it shows that WORTH.COM, PEACE.EXE, and CONTENTMENT.COM are installing themselves all over my HEART!

CS Rep: Then LOVE is installed and running. You should be able to handle it from here. One more thing before I go...

Customer: Yes?

CS Rep: LOVE is freeware. Be sure to give it and its various modules to everybody you meet. They will in turn share it with other people and they will return some really neat modules back to you.

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