There are 10 steps to the thought/feeling record worksheet. The first six steps will help you identify the automatic negative thoughts, the unpleasant feelings and better understand where they came from. The next four steps will help you develop positive energizing thoughts which in turn will produce pleasant feelings.
Write about unpleasant experiences that you would like to have handled differently. You can write about past or current experiences. Start with easy ones first. Get a lot of practice before you deal with more un-comfortable experiences. Print this worksheet and write the answers down - don't try to do this work in your head.
“I made a mistake at work."
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
_____________________________________________________________________________
“I feel like a failure. If people knew the real me, they wouldn't like me."
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
This is self-labelling and disqualifying the positives. It produces unpleasant feelings: sadness, fear, rejection, anger, jealousy, anxiety, stress, frustration, etc.
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
“I can hear the voice of my parent saying that I’m a failure and that I’ll never amount to anything."
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
Evidence for: “I'm hard on myself. I don't always succeed. It's when I try to be perfect that I feel overwhelmed and disappointed in myself."
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
Evidence against: "I do succeed sometimes. People have complimented me on my work. My friends see me as a good, honest and caring person."
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
“I'm damaging my self-esteem. If I continue to think like this, my negativity will affect my relationships and possibly my health. I'll become an exhausted, fearful, angry, sad, distrustful, insecure, doubtful, anxious, lonely, victimized and negative person."
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
“I don't have to succeed at everything. I might not succeed at this, but that doesn't mean I fail at everything. I want to get rid of this negative thinking. I'm not gaining anything by being hard on myself."
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
“I am successful in many ways." Possible feelings: secure, dynamic, confident, brave, thankful, satisfied, optomistic, etc.
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
“I'm going to celebrate my victories, and focus on the positives. The next time I slip (make a mistake), I won't dwell on the negatives and waste my energy. Instead I'll focus on what I can learn from my slip."
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
This is self-labelling and qualifying the positives. Your positive thinking continues to produce pleasant feelings: happy, playful, relaxed, loving, confident, secure, optimistic, etc.
List pleasant feelings you will experience over time:
______________________________________________________________________________
______________________________________________________________________________
Put PETs
(positive energizing thoughts) in your emotional bank account.
The more you invest – the richer you become.
For a more complete guide to cognitive therapy refer to the book "I Want to Change My Life" by Dr. Steven M. Melemis.
Ask your doctor or therapist if cognitive therapy is right for you. These techniques can complement the work you do with your therapist, but they should be used in combination with professional guidance.